My mum always laughs when I use the words play date. She figures you’re just having a friend over, so say so. But play date is such a part of our common language today in North America (OK, in my part of North America) that even the kids say it without hesitation.

My son loves to have friends over. I show up at the school and he is asking for play dates before the bell has even gone to let them out. There is always a struggle between wanting him to have fun with his friends and needing enough time to decompress from the hustle of school days.

We seem to have settled on one friend a week can come over to play after school. However there is one family across the street that he likes to play with, and if they are available then he can play with them as long as there is no work to do. Interestingly, that is the only time he will say “go play with” rather than “have a play date with”.

Of course, you hate to tell your child but there is always a kid or two that you just don’t really want to have over. In our case it is usually because of my son’s reactions with those kids, not because they aren’t good kids. One boy gets him so hyper there is always a crash at some point. It’s not fun.

Some of his friends find it odd that they aren’t allowed to watch TV here. We have no TV for our son until the week-end, and rarely allow it when friends are over even then. He wanted them to come over and play — if there is no interest in that then what was the point? {This is only my house philosophy, I do not judge any family for the TV rules in their house.}

As he gets older the play dates are easier. The kids know what they want to do and tend to keep themselves quite busy until the end. There is less need for me to intervene. Just feed them and send them off to play.

Come to think of it; maybe we all need play dates once a week!